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"There are somethings that are nothing more than what they are. They're not meant to last. They just take their place in your heart and make you a little smarter the next time." -Alex and Emma use that mouse
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(c) 2006
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Tuesday, March 08, 2005
damn. i hate backstabbers.. but who doesn't?? *this post is stamped with an invisible warning that says "this is such a lousy and so-full-of-hatred entry." i have read in a book (veronica decides to die) that we should not be worried if our presence bothers other people.. if they are bothered, then they should let you know, otherwise.. that's their problem.. i think that makes a lot of sense.. man. i am not saying i don't tell lies but when it comes to how i really feel, thats a different story.. god knows how honest i am when it comes to showing emotions and all.. as what they say, what you see is what you get.. although most of the time, people misjudge me.. if something bothers me, whatever it is, i let it out.. be it big or small. i remember when i just finished reading jostein gaarder's great novel, the solitaire mystery, a lot of things (about the novel) started to trouble me. of course, i couldn't confront the book -- i am not that psychotic yet. i also tried getting the author's contact number whatsoever (ahh. talk about desperate measures!) but ended up complaining to my bestfriend instead. she must have gotten nauseated with all my whinings that she decided to might as well read the book. you see, even if its really babaw, id show how i feel. i wouldn't care what or how other people would react. like one time, i thought i lost my Diagnosis Handbook, i cried. some thought it was really stupid to cry over a handbook. still i continued to wept. i explained, "kung sa ibang araw lang talaga nangyari to, okay lang. kaso pagod ako ngayon eh. sobrang stressed, tos madadagdagan pa." later, i realized that i didn't owe them an explanation. di ba? and then much much later on, someone returned my handbook to me. -- okay, that was really dumb of me. hehe. anyways... i am frank. my truest friends could attest to that. even if you're my friend, id tell in your face what it is that i like about you.. or what it is you've done that i think might be wrong or something.. or if you've hurt me or whatever.. really, i am honest when it comes to these things.. even to my boyfriend (whenever i have one). and if you're just an acquaintance or whatever, my actions would speak whether or not you should start backing off me. know what i mean? even to my dad and brothers.. i am like that. i tell them what hurts or annoys me. everything! as in.. i have always been like that.. i wouldn't give a sh*t if you'd want to kill me afterwards or something for as long as i am able to say how or what i really feel. if i will not be able to say or show it, i'll just keep everything to myself.. it disappoints me how some people are not like that. some cannot even tell how they really feel. but what really sucks is when people are able to let it out but not to those people concerned. instead, they hit other people behind their backs. geez.. whats wrong with them?? i hate it most when i am the one being backstabbed.. buti if everything they're saying is true.. panu kung mga lies pa, di ba? and it hurts even more if the backstabber is someone you thought na friend mo pa. and first class liars?? oh man! i so want to kill them all. grr. ahh.. i suddenly remembered one of my ex's.. damn. he's a BIG TIME liar.. haha.. [we're friends..okay? so don't get me wrong.] its just that i never thought there are people who could really LIE that much.. gets? and of all people.. i trusted him so much i didn't expect he'd be capable of being such a liar to me.. *okay, bone, that is so long time ago..* point is, backstabbers, liars and all those sorts.. they're really some of my frustrations.. they never cease to hurt me.. to make me feel betrayed. hayy.. some people nga naman. if you've reached this point, thanks so much for the time. Bone painted the world at 12:20 AM | |
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because if you choose silence, people take advantage of you.
because if you dont speak, they will tell lies. because if you dont care and simply live life, they make up stories. because if you are loved, others will bring you down.
sometimes, you need a place you can call your own. where all you see and hear is the truth. a place where you see colors instead of just black&white. a happy place. home.
